Sitting in the Front Row of My Life…
I’ve come to the conclusion that sometimes one has to travel through an idea to land where one needs to be.
As I have stated before, I am in the season of living out my heart’s desires, and fashion is one of them. My first serious declaration of my desired relationship with the fashion world was when I collaborated with accessories designer Agnes Baddoo, for our IT bag [got another drop with her, so check out the Loot on the dézine].
I didn’t just want to wear the clothes and look beautiful in them; I envisioned myself authentically and genuinely being a part of the world. My goal is to introduce “forever items” that are made so well that they can be heirloom pieces; and I want to do so sustainably, which translates into limited runs targeted to consumers who value quality, design, and local craftsmanship.
This approach to fashion, in turn, supports the local economy and reduces the impact on the environment. My love of fashion will also show up on IG occasionally when I feel my fit is cute, like recently when I attended the shows of Ulla Johnson, Prabal Gurung, and Gabriella Hearst and co-hosted a party with Editor-In-Chief Asad Syrkett of Elle Decor and my designer, Tiffany Howell of NightPalm, to celebrate the coveted September Cover during NYFW (New York Fashion Week).
It was a whirlwind of energy, excitement, and celebration of creativity, a moment of ascertainment that produced an invitation to Paris Fashion Week from Chloé. I felt like Cinderella: I had a handsome prince putting on my glass slipper while another handsome prince was helping me put on my coat. When I saw the text, the world slowed down for a minute because I realized that I had manifested a heart’s desire. I was in awe of the power that dreaming, imagining, visualizing, and asking could have.
Though arrangements and RSVPs were made, ultimately, I could not go. I needed to be home. The vibration changes in the room when you know where your attention is really needed. I actually felt the pull while I was modeling outfits for Salim, my love who introduced me to Chloé in the first place. Maybe it was Nasir’s sniffles or his tiredness around homework and his baseball schedule that made me realize he needed more nurturing. Sure, Daddy always holds it down, but there was a pull that made me slow down to see that Nasir needed to be catered to by both his parents.
Now was not the time to talk to his mom via FaceTime from Paris. Not this time, anyway. I realized that the entire summer, really his entire life, his older brother, Yasin, had dictated the pace of our household – especially with the transition to college eating up a lot of the parental focus. But now with Yasin in college across the country, we had a new rhythm we all had to find together. School had just started, baseball was picking up, and I was talking about going on a second trip for fashion.
He gracefully understood why I had to be in New York. In fact, he was excited for me to attend the party to celebrate the September Issue Cover Story because he knew all my life it was my dream to be in this magazine with the house of my dreams. Even though he thought his mom was cool for getting invited to Paris, it also meant I’d have to leave again very soon. And why? To check off a fantasy and sit on the front row of Chloé as I took pictures in my cute outfits? Of course, but Mama needed to be on the front row of her life instead. Just like you know when to go, trust when it’s time to stay.
Just like you know
when to go, trust when
it’s time to stay.
We make choices, and Mercury Retrograde made me have a seat. But life is not about what we missed, it’s about how we are redirected (the gift of Mercury Retrograde). The pause reminded me of my priorities, while also confirming and fine-tuning the desire. I don’t just want to go to Paris Fashion Week, I want to go to all of the fashion shows as regularly as my life allows. But ultimately I was reminded about what my heart truly desires, and that is to intuitively know when and how to be there for those I love. That is the most fashionable thing I ever want to do: know when to show up and BE THERE.
The Bonus in this pause on the way to Paris is that I discovered more about myself and my style. Here are a few snaps from the front row of my life depicting how this LA girl wanted to be seen at her first Paris Fashion Week which was forecasted to include some rainy days. All looks styled by me, right out of my dreamy closet.
The Bonus Bonus, Nasir is doing great!
STYLING: Mara Brock Akil
HAIR: Vernon Francois
MAKEUP: Kerry Malouf
GRILLZ: Quinn
PHOTOGRAPHY: Jazmin Johnson & Sean Bartley
WORDS: Mara Brock Akil
Mara you look sensational and this article so profound about Being There Here Now. Your stylings are truly inspirational and your hat is Everything!!!
Your style is so regal yet edgy–the perfect combination.
Thanks for sharing and continuing to be an inspiration.
Your words were necessary for me to read today. Thank you for your vulnerability and honesty. Your style is a beautiful bonus!
Profound! Edgy! Inspiring! Dope!!!
Thanks for sharing this lovely (very human) story, and much appreciated insight! Beautiful photo shoot! The hair! The hat! All of it🔥🔥🔥
Love the fashion and loving your truth telling in this post. As a mother of three I often feel that pull to stay vs go. I’ve never experienced this tug as a conflict or an endless pursuit to “have it all”. I know, just as you so clearly articulated in your post, when I can keep pushing and when I need to slow down, breathe deep and be present in the “front row” for my family. Thank you for giving voice to this intuitive knowing.
This piece is so timely for me. Sitting front row of your life also includes honoring the audience that matters most. I’ll never miss out by living this way. I needed this clarity. Thank you. 🤎
Can this lady be more inspiring, respected and beautiful! I love how you have taken the canvas and orchestrated the gorgeous art that is you. Thank you for using this platform. It is empowering and breath-taking!
You look absolutely glowing and gorgeous, Mara. Radiant!
Your Stunning Mara! Oh Can You Please Feature Vernon Francois And Or What You Use For Your Hair Regimen? My Whites Are Coming In Strong And Their Texture Is Giving Me Don King Vibes. Help Mara, Help. Need Some Guidance On How To Tame This Mane. Thanks In Advance <3